Movie Parties I Wish I Had Attended

As Fatty Arbuckle could tell you, nobody knows how to party quite like film stars. And there’s been one example after another in the entirety of film history. Which movie parties would have been the most interesting and/or fun to attend?

One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest
Let me get this straight. I’m going to live it up with R.P. MacMurphy, a young Danny Devito, Scatman Crothers, Christopher Lloyd, a young Brad Dourif, some prostitutes that have been smuggled in, and the whole thing is going to really cheese off the vile Nurse Ratched? Sign. Me. Up.

La Grande Bouffe
Occasionally, you’ll hear people say that you should live every day of your life like it’s your last. The folks in La Grande Bouffe took this to an amazing extreme. The premise is this, per the IMDB Plot Description:

Four successful middle-aged men Marcello, a pilot; Michel, a television executive; Ugo, a chef; and, Philippe, a judge go to Philippe’s villa to eat themselves to death. After the first night, Marcello insists that women should join them. Three prostitutes make it through a day or two; Andrea, a local school teacher, stays to the end.

Luis Bunuel called it “a hedonistic monument”, and I don’t think you could describe it any better than that. In addition to hedonism, the other primary feature is the satire of the excess of consumer culture. It’s a completely grotesque but also hilarious assault on the human body- on the mouth, on the genitals, on the internal organs (specifically the digestion system and intestines). Say what you will, but nobody was robbed of anything at this party. You know, except for their lives.

Animal House
The list of things in this world better than being a booze-addled, debaucherous 18 to 22 year old is very short. Miniscule. You can probably count those things on one hand.

Orgy of the Dead
This little-known film was written by Ed Wood as a transition between directing regular movies and pornography. What does it feature? A flock of hot topless 60’s women in bikini bottoms dancing around a fire; a mummy and a werewolf (and when the werewolf guy howls, you can see his neck where the wolf mask ends); some Egyptian guys who whip a topless girl in a cat costume (eventually she strips down to just the cat ears and bikini bottoms); and enough nudity that after the 15th boob, it actually starts to get a little boring.

Festen/The Celebration
“Hey, happy 60th birthday, Dad. Let’s all toast Dad! Oh,and by the way, he molested me.”

You have my attention for the duration of the party.

Bram Stoker’s Dracula (1992)
Nobody wants to wind up a snack for a 400 year old ghoul, but that shadow gag is one hell of a party trick.

American Movie
Watching a Super Bowl “party” devolve from two film-making buddies watching their favorite team in the Super Bowl… with their mom… into a pity party is hysterical. It’s a three minute character arc. And bonus points for it being Super Bowl XXXI, where the Packers won (yours truly is a Packer fan). (side note- there’s some language in the clip, so it might not be safe for work)

Specifically, the mortgage brokers’ convention in the hotel. If you’re a mortgage broker, there is a 103% chance that everything related to your job is as boring as watching grass grow. And in one fell dong-infused swoop, Borat and Azamat gave you and your fellow mortgage brokers something to talk about for years, decades, maybe even centuries. It’s going to be at least 100 years from now that something that funny happens at another mortgage broker convention.

If you can’t live it up on the White House lawn with President Dwayne Elizondo Mountain Dew Herbert Camacho after doing a kick-ass job and getting yourself a full Presidential pardon, you’re beyond help.

The Exterminating Angel (1962)
Let’s let IMDB Keywords do the work for us.

Lamb  •  Upper Class  •  Pretension  •  Inertia  •  Sheep  •  Piano Recital  •  Quarantine  •  Starvation  •   Unknown Power  •  Laudanum  •  Bear  •  Sonata  •  Catholicism  •  Disembodied Hand  •  Reference To The Pope  •  Death  •  Marital Infidelity  •  Opera Singer  •  Maid  •  Hallucination  •  Angel  •  Etiquette  •  Cancer Patient  •  Morphine  •  Beautiful Woman  •  Hippocrates  •  Stabbing  •  Reference To Sherlock Holmes  •  Caviar  •  Avant Garde  •  Ice Sculpture  •  Architect  •  Pain Killer

That’s not the full list but I’m pretty sure that should give you a general idea of what kind of party it was.


Filed under French Film, Humor, Movies

8 responses to “Movie Parties I Wish I Had Attended

  1. The party I would love to have crashed was “afterparty” at the Acapulco Film Festival in 1968 after the debut of Fando and Lis where Alejandro Jodorowsky was nearly killed by a raging audience who clearly didn’t find artistic merit in his work. Supposedly he had to jump into a moving car to get away from the anti-surrealist hordes.

    • Heh… good ol’ Jodorowsky. If you’ve ever seen the “Worker and Parasite” clip from The Simpsons… the look on Krusty’s face when it’s through is really similar to the one I had on my own face after I watched “El Topo”.

  2. fuzzywuzzy

    I’d like to go to Connie’s wedding reception in The Godfather.

  3. I’m thinking I might have to watch The Exterminating Angel. Any party that can combine sheep, Catholicism, a disembodied hand, and opera singers is worth checking out.

    So you’re a Packers fan, huh? I guess you won’t be very pleased when they are left out of the playoffs at 11-5 and my 7-9 Niners make it in.

    • Plus, Hippocrates.

      I’m just hoping they can catch the Bears. It’d be one thing to go 11-5 while the ‘Niners make it at 7-9 if it’s because the Vikings won the division. But not the Bears.

  4. They should be able to catch the Bears and win the division. They still have to play them in Green Bay, don’t they?

    My entire family is made up of Vikings fans, so I’d actually prefer the Bears made it over them….otherwise I have to constantly hear about how awesome they are. But they don’t even have a stadium to play in anymore…

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s