Tag Archives: Revenge of the Nerds

Fictional Colleges I Wish I Had Graduated From

All over the United States, colleges and universities are granting diplomas to a flood of kids who have earned them through four to seven years of hard work, with intermittent periods of impairment and debauchery. It makes me nostalgic for the time when I was one of those impaired, fun-loving creatures on the cusp of taking a job from some poor sap. I miss those years because it’s such a spectacular time in a young person’s life. At the time of graduation, you have endured the maximum amount of youthful highjinx before you must begin the process of becoming a really boring adult. I’m content with my degree from my alma mater, but here are some fictional colleges I wish I’d graduated from. And congrats to any graduates out there:

Harrison UniversityOld School (2003)
The best part of graduating from Harrison University is that your campus connections would include that guy who hilariously does the obscene version of Bonnie Tyler’s “Turn Around”. No matter how many weddings and divorces and more weddings you have post-graduation, you could always make the reception memorable. Depending on the type of degree you have- like, say, a political science degree (hypothetically)- a connection like that is way more valuable than your undergraduate degree. Continue reading

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Ranking the Colleges, Movie-Style

Choosing the correct place of higher learning can be stressful for a drunk, horny 17 year old. Fortunately, there are many choices out there in Movieland. How do they compare? Continue reading

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